Best Dating Podcasts for LGBT Millennials

Author: Mary Grace Donaldson, The Dating Game

There aren’t too many aspects of dating that don’t have their difficult points. Between first dates, figuring out the perfect profile for your dating app, longing for the dating world of another time and not giving in the pressure to date when you’re singlepodcasts lend a sympathetic voice from those who have been there.

Dating within the LGBT community — as a millennial, living in our own dating world that we’ve created — has its own set of trials and tribulations. Here are some of our favorite podcasts that understand the struggle.

 

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The Heart 
According to one of its producers, The Heart “covers the triumphs and terrors of human intimacy, the bliss and banality of being in love, and the wild diversity of the human heart.” It is also listed as one of the “Top 12 Podcasts Hosted By Queer Women For Your Queer Ears” by Autostraddle.com. An entire season in 2015 is dedicated to couples who either “decided whether to stay together or go their separate ways.”

 

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Coupla Questions 
Another podcast earning a spot on the aforementioned Autostraddle list, the minds behind Coupla Questions “interview their favorite couples about how they fell in love and stayed in love.” Episodes feature two men who met while performing on a cruise ship and fell in love and two women who started out as friends but became something more, just to name a few.

 

 

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Same Sex Dialogue  
While there aren’t any recent episodes of Same Sex Dialogue, it’s worth a listen. The show’s hosts cover current events and news surrounding the LGBT community, but other topics include “I Don’t Have a Clue Who I Married,” “Love at First Protein Shake,” whether or not you should be friends with your ex and gay parenting.

 

 

A Gay and A NonGay
This podcast addresses the issue of hate speech in our society right from the get-go. “A Gay And A NonGay challenges many of our differences head on and promises that no matter who you are, or what you’re into (Bruce Springsteen or Britney), love is love and gay and nongays can be friends,” the podcast intro states. Episodes are not limited to dating-related topics, but when getting into the dating realm of things, episodes include dating out of your comfort zone, questioning your sexuality and “The 36 Questions That Lead to Love.”

 

 

While these podcasts are not specifically targeted to LGBT millennials, they apply to a wide range of age groups — including millennials. Their dating war stories are certainly ones that we can sympathize with.

Valentine's Day

Whether You’re Single or Taken, Enjoy This Valentine’s Day

Author: Claire Greene, The Dating Game

I’m going to be honest. I have a bone to pick with Valentine’s Day. It originates from the Feast of St. Valentine, who was a Roman Emperor who was imprisoned for performing weddings for soldiers who were forbidden to marry.

However, I personally believe that on this holiday, all types of love should be celebrated. Romantic love is not the only type of love that exists. I believe that the love one has for family and friends should be celebrated as well.

We’ve already talked about how it’s okay to be single — but we’re going to give a different type of dating advice for single millennials who think they can’t celebrate Valentine’s Day. Guess what? You can! I’m going to discuss what all people can do for each other on Valentine’s Day — not only romantic couples.

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Have a Galentine’s Day (or any other fun day with your friends)
This is my own Valentines Day standby (though we hear all about it on Parks and Recreation). There is nothing I love more than spending Valentine’s Day binge-watching rom-coms or Netflix, and eating junk food with my friends whom I love.

One year I had my college friends come visit and we watched romantic comedies and went in the hot tub, margaritas in hand (which you can also substitute with wine). It was a great night, and not once did I dwell on the fact that I was not with a romantic love, because I was with love in a different way.

Do a Secret Santa-like gift exchange
Since I was little, my parents would always give me and my brother small gifts on Valentine’s Day to show that they had love for us. This gesture always held a lot of meaning to me. I now, in a way, carry that tradition by giving little small items of appreciation to my friends on Valentine’s Day. No need to break the bank — you can even make your gift. It is just a tiny item to show someone that you love him or her. It is about the thought you put into it and the sentimental value, and not the monetary value.

Pamper yourself at the spa
Valentine’s Day can also be about loving yourself. Take the time to treat yourself well, and indulge in the things that you don’t usually indulge in. Also, if you take a friend, you may be able to take advantage of couples deals.

Love should always be inclusive, not exclusive. Fight the standard that Valentine’s Day should only be about romantic love, and show everyone you love that you care about them. That is what it should be about.

When It’s Not a Date

Author: Mary Grace Donaldson, The Dating Game

What I’m about to share with you is nothing short of a dating-related horror story. That said, it’s an opportunity to draw from and grow, and in turn offer advice.

I thought it was a date.

I was a few years out of college at the time and we’d been unable to coordinate our schedules. I fully thought it felt like a date. Come to think of it, I should have consulted with my peers, who were (and still are) significantly more experienced at playing the field than I am. But when we arrived — separately — it didn’t take me long to realize that this meeting was not, in fact, a date.

My companion wasted no time in telling me that a relationship, in any form, was not on the horizon. I smiled and nodded and on the inside, I felt, for lack of better terminology, friend-zoned. More significantly, I felt embarrassed. I came into this “meetup” with high expectations — after all, we’d tried for months to get together, and it didn’t end up at all as I’d hoped.

I sat there and tried to enjoy the rest of the time. I refrained from asking any embarrassing questions, including “Are we on a date?” or “Why do you feel like you’re not ready for a relationship?” I drank my coffee and ate my cookie and felt my cheeks grow increasingly red. I couldn’t wait to leave and from what I remember of the rest of the “date” (because I honestly don’t remember much) I spent it making awful jokes at my own expense.

Now that we know what not to do, here’s how you can learn from my mistakes:

  • Try to save the evening, but don’t try too hard. Think of trying to save yourself from embarrassment. Don’t overcompensate with loud, obnoxious jokes, but don’t stay silent either.
  • Don’t get ruffled, and remember that we’ve all been there. Talk to this person as though you’re speaking to a casual friend because, after all, that’s whom you’re now talking to.
  • At this point, you can be yourself. The “first impression” portion of the evening has ended. Maybe you can gain a friend out of this experience. That’s a more likely outcome if you just act as naturally as possible.
  • Don’t get your hopes up. If it’s made obvious from early on that it is very much not a date, don’t try to make it into one. It won’t help anyone, including you.
  • Let it go. Leave when it feels natural to you to leave. If you did drive together, don’t try too hard to make idle conversation in the car. If it feels right to you, great. If not, don’t. You can put up with the awkward silence for a half hour car ride. If you do gain a friend, great, but if you don’t, now is not the time to beat yourself up. Chalk it up to experience and try again tomorrow.

Remember, don’t let this one experience dictate your entire dating life! You won’t encounter this embarrassing misfortune every time you make a date with someone. The experience is something you’ll laugh about one day — I know I do.