Long-Term Relationships and Millennials Can Be Used In the Same Sentence

Author: Chelsea Mulligan, The Dating Game

We all know the sweet story of how our grandparents fell in love as teenagers. In my case, my parents grew up as neighbors and also fell in love in their teenage years. Call it genetic or just a coincidence, but I too fell in love in high school. Our long night chats on AIM have turned into short text messages and quick tags on Instagram. Our daily routine used to be meeting up at each other’s locker and now it’s the main question that we all ask: what’s for dinner and who’s cooking?

It’s been almost eight years since we started dating, and I wish I could say it’s all been great and carefree, but that would be a lie. Being a millennial and in a serious relationship is no easy task. We have been through some difficult times. High school was filled with as much drama as expected. After high school, we were faced with him being older and going out to places where I couldn’t go for a couple of years. Things that seem so petty now were extremely difficult then.

There were instances where we thought “we might not be able to get through this one,” but we’ve always overcame our issues. We are both extremely hard-headed and competitive, which definitely comes into play when we argue, because one of us has to win the argument (usually me). We have learned the ins and outs of one another and developed an amazing relationship over the  years. For a lack of better words, we now just “get” each other.

Over the years, I have been asked numerous times by people, even strangers in town, if I ever feel like I’m missing out on the single life. My answer has always been, no. Sure, it’s funny to hear a comical/drunk story about my friends meeting guys and girls out, but I’ve never pictured myself in that element. I’ve learned a lot by being with my boyfriend throughout high school and college — and I wouldn’t trade that for anything. It’s the best because I always have the following:

A Friend
Whenever I think in depth about our relationship, I realize that over the years, my boyfriend has become my best friend. He is the person I want to tell all my secrets to and call first thing in the morning to see what we can do for the day. If there ever comes a day that we part ways, I would (obviously) be devastated that I am out of a relationship, but I would be heartbroken to lose my best friend.

Someone To Share My Life With
Our memories together have become such a vital part of our relationship. They give us reasons to look back and laugh at what we’ve been through. We’ve gone to proms, graduations, family parties, vacations, concerts—practically everything together. I often find myself saying “we” instead of “I” when talking about all the things I’ve been through, because he’s been right by my side through it all.

My personality has given me the ability to laugh and talk with anyone, but it’s when I’m feeling sad that I realize how much I need him in life. Sharing the hard times in life with someone means everything. We’ve sat in hospitals many nights, cried in funeral homes, taken care of each other when we are not ourselves and just overall been a strong support system for one another. Even when we fight, he’s the shoulder I want to lean on, no matter how mad I can be at him in that moment.

Someone To Be Comfortable Around
“You look fine, can we just go?” It’s something I constantly hear from him when he’s hungry or we are trying to catch a movie. As I try to get my top eyeliner straight or try to make a presentable messy bun, I tend to get frustrated with him while he’s rushing me, but then I realize how lucky I am to have someone who doesn’t care what I look like when we go out. We could be watching Netflix for hours and he doesn’t mind taking me out right afterward.

I never have to put a smile on my face when he knows I’m not feeling well. I can express what’s hurting or bothering me. He’s all ears and tries his best to make me feel better, whether it means getting me a Payday candy bar or turning down the lights and letting me watch my favorite movie or a couple of episodes on HGTV. I don’t have to feel uncomfortable expressing how I feel and it’s truly a great thing in our relationship.

I can also be extremely dramatic. With him, I know I can turn up a Backstreet Boys song and belt my heart out or bounce in my seat when a good house song comes on. It’s okay that he necessarily isn’t laughing with me—and more just laughing at me. I can be myself, have fun with him and act out our favorite song together.

Whoever said “it’s about the little things in life” is 100% right. I have learned to appreciate so much in my relationship over the last seven and a half years. Never, ever would I have predicted to be with him in this day and age. I thought it would be a high school thing and there would be a time where we would go our separate ways to grow on our own. But fate has kept us growing together and I am able to confidently say that we are still going strong and probably will for many more years to come, if not forever.

My main piece of advice would be: put the phone awayI can promise you that there is nothing more important on Instagram and Facebook than spending quality time with the person you are dating. We don’t use our phones at dinner or while watching a movie. That quality time leads to great conversation and it is something I cherish.

I am enjoying this roller-coaster we are on. To fully answer the question as to why I am in a long term relationship and why I don’t have the urge to explore what else is out there? I am too happy to give up what I have. Why would I give up everything that I’ve built with him to meet all new people to learn about, when at the end of the day all I really want is what I already have? (Make sense?) I am with someone who lets me be myself day-in and day-out, who understands me in every way possible and who most importantly, loves me on my worst days and makes them better for me.

3 thoughts on “Long-Term Relationships and Millennials Can Be Used In the Same Sentence

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s